The List: #7
Hello, beautiful people.
Today is Tuesday.
There is no significance to this day.
Hold that thought -
there is now.
Because I'm posting NUMBER 7: What is your dream job, and why?
Talk about a tricky one.
My first thought was a famous and/or not particularly poor singer extraordinaire.
Sounds like a lot of work, and quite frankly I don't have the pipes to support that kind of career.
Then I thought about what I wanted to be when I was a kid.
Basketball player - too short
Hair stylist - too little patience
Stay-at-home mom - lack of children
Due to recent interests, I have come to conclude that my absolute dream job would be a combination of many.
First up -
A personal trainer - slash - aerobics instructor - slash - walk around answering questions of bewildered gym-goers person
[and also to wear a sweet outfit like this]
I love the gym.
When I actually convince myself to go, I love the gym.
Yeah, sometimes it's smelly and stuffy and generally gross in so many ways, but that's the beauty of it; no one cares. We're all there for the same goal - sweating our asses off, day in and day out, struggling to keep the gut at bay.
This way, I would be getting paid to hang out in a gym all day - in sweatpants, mind you - and act like I'm cool because I enjoy working out.
next:
show choir teacher
Let me specify that this would have to be high school age and up.
I assure you that teaching 4th graders how to play the recorder is something I personally view as one of the cruelest forms of human punishment.
Though the idea of teaching high-school kids [evil muskrats that see you as a tasty treat for them to devour at any moment] sounds terrible, I would accept the challenge and use their teen angst as a tool at my disposal.
Verbal outbursts would likely have a calming effect on the beastly adolescents, and from there the amount of respect they have for me will double every time I spout a witty form of humiliation in their general direction.
After that, it's cake.
Singing, dancing, and overall "Glee" [pun intended] whilst singing Broadway's best.
lastly:
water girl on the KU basketball team
I'll do this one for free.
this
+
=awesome
My pay will be stepping within 100 feet of any KU basketball player and/or Bill Self.
Not much more needs to be said.
------------------
So basically I'm seeking a position with a gym that requires flexible hours, doesn't mind show choir practice on grounds, and requires me to work 2-3 days a week [have to schedule off for games].
That's doable, right?
You are so funny! I love reading your blog!
ReplyDelete